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Gratefulness

Gratitude: Research Reveals The Correlation of 1 Positive Trait & 1 Negative Trait: “Which Do You Have?”

What Research Tells Us

You probably have read a few times or more that possessing the trait of gratitude could enhance your entire life and make some gradual and permanent changes for the better. In fact, your overall well-being is affected just from having a consistent mind-set of gratitude even for the smallest and simplest tasks.

The Five Categories That Are Affected by Gratitude

In addition, the science indicates that there are 5 main category states of well-being that affect our lives directly from being grateful:

1-emotional…strength, more relaxed, less envy

2-career…goal oriented, productive, better management

3-personality…more optimism, less self-focused, increased self-esteem

4-social…more social. compassionate, better relationships

5-health…better sleep, more energy, less ill

The Moral Aspect of Gratitude

It may be difficult to comprehend but it has been studied that gratitude affects one’s moral character by acting as a gage for behavior.

For example, people who feel gratitude are:

1-more inclined to help others,

2-feel more empathy,

3-positive about pro-social acts and

4-unsupportive of negative or harmful behavior.

Some people with consistent feelings of gratefulness are inclined to draw on and connect to their spiritual-side. Gratitude is said to bring people closer to the idea that there is a Super-Being…God. The feelings seem to happen automatically as if it is the natural process of growth in the spiritual realm.

However, in spite of all the positive effects of feeling gratitude, there still remains some psychologists who are not totally convinced about the abundant results connected to gratefulness. These researchers believe that although the many positive feelings that gratitude may bring about, there is scientifically only one definitive positive and negative trait associated with it.

According to researchers:

  • Agreeableness = Positive Trait Correlated with Gratitude
  • Neuroticism = Negative Trait Correlated with Gratitude

Agreeableness

In addition to being one of the five basic aspects of the Big Five Personality Theory (extroversion, openness, neurotic, conscientious, agreeable) (Lewis Goldberg, 1998), it seems that being an agreeable person demonstrates such qualities as kindness, trusting and unselfish giving to others. In fact, he/she likes connecting to people and is considered as a very “social individual” getting along with others regularly. It is a person who freely and easily interacts with associates, family, friends and colleagues, while showing affection and giving compliments is second nature to them. In other words, this person probably has excellent innate social skills, as well. Moreover, it is likely that the additional traits of kindness and unselfishness shine through consistently in readily helping and assisting others, who may be in need.

Neuroticism

On the flip side of gratefulness, there lies its counterpart of negativity. Negativity resides in a person who is narcissistic by nature. Having a narcissistic personality trait is usually described as a negative trait that is demonstrated by a person who readily reacts to stress with varied emotional states, such as, mood changes, irritability, anxiety, guilt and shame.

The reason for some of these emotions is the guidelines that neurotics set for themselves are often unrealistic and too high to accomplish within their self-implemented time limits. A more popular definition is to describe them as having an over-the-top conscience. When aspirations are not met, that’s where the problems set in for them. They seem to exhibit other off-spring of emotions that are triggered from their unrealistic expectations. The condition is actually termed as a personality disorder. But it is one that can be corrected if monitored with consistency, as a lifetime endeavor. Many disorders have to be monitored during a person’s lifetime journey, since the condition may have underlying origins.

As you can see, there is quite a contrast between agreeableness and neuroticism. It’s not that neurotics are ungrateful; it’s that they may find it more difficult to be agreeable at times, when their emotions such as mood and expectations alter their behavior. It is difficult for them to keep up with the sudden changes that may occur with life and their rigid guidelines they have set-up for themselves of not being met within their time-frame. Remember, that gratitude could be present in their lives, as well.

Neurotics Could Be Happier

This is why I believe that neurotics can be happier if they learn to practice a set of different patterns of behaviors as opposed to the comfort patterns they are accustomed to. Moreover, many neurotics have the disorder as a trait, which they have been born with or have developed from a very young age.

My Personal Theory

Based on  what I have read, researched and observed, I believe that people who experience gratefulness consistently in their lives, have a more than adequate resource of positive self-esteem. They are most likely to be comfortable in their own skin because they have an open social pattern of interaction with different personalities from their own. This would also indicate that a grateful person is nonjudgemental; e.g., willing to give others the benefit of the doubt, making he/she a trusting soul.

In contrast, the neurotic person may have trouble believing in their self-esteem and exhibit feelings of inadequate tendencies based on their unrealistic capabilities of   meeting their expectations; additionally, their conscience of inadequate abilities are also unrealistic. They may be very well competent except for their exaggerated judgements concerning and evaluating themselves.

All in all, gratefulness or gratitude practiced as automatic behavioral patterns can and will affect one’s life, tremendously. In fact, it can change your whole life dramatically. A simple trait that makes you feel so good even if experienced for moments at a time, does more for you as an overall-constant feeling that cannot be replaced.

So, when someone tells you that you are too nice of a person, just answer them with a smile, like this:

“1.)—a person can never be too nice…there is no such thing.

2.)—You should try incorporating a little gratitude in your life daily and maybe someone will tell you the same thing-“you’re just too nice!”

References

Amin, A. (2016). The 31 benefits of gratitude you didn’t know about: how          gratitude can change your life. Retrieved from

http://happierhuman.com/benefits-of-gratitude/#comment-1110093

Fraser-Thil, R. (2016). Agreeabeness in the “big 5” theory of personality. Psychology:

     Concepts and Connections, 8. Retrieved from      https://www.verywell.com/agreeable-personality-3287986

Jaffe, E. (2012). “In the neurotic mind” Post Meta Observer, 25,10. Retrieved from

     http://www.psychologicalscience.org/index.php/video/inside-the-neurotic-mind-2.html

N.A. Gratitude and happiness: development of a measure…-greater good.

Retrieved from greatergood.berkeley.edu/…/GratitudePDFs/

N.A. The science of gratitude: more benefits than expected; 26 studies.

Retrieved from happierhuman.com/the-science-of-gratitude/

Simon, G. Dr. (2008). Neurotic vs. character disorder? criterion two-conscience. Retrieved from

     –http://www.manipulative-people.com/neurotic-vs-character-disorder-criterion-two-conscience/

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