Did you know that your purpose in life was already formed from birth? You can frantically stop searching for your purpose because we all share an innate purpose decided for us the moment we breathe our first breath. Take this knowledge that I am going to impart to you and apply it to your life’s journey. I promise you, you will be a happier person throughout life and you will not even have to search for a calling because it is already laid out for you.
Love & Belonging Supersede Our Quest for Self-Actualization?
“No Person is an Island” ….John Donne (1975)
Psychology research indicates that interrelationships are initiated in different ways according to Freud, (1930). In addition to Freud, Maslow (1968) (‘Hierarchy of Needs’), indicated that “love and belongingness needs” are prominent only after basic needs of food, safety, and hunger are satisfied. However, the need of love and belonging rank above our concerns of personal self-esteem and self-actualization (Baumeister & Leary, 1995). In other words, the driving force of self-accomplishment and our self-esteem (a fulfillment of one’s talents and potential) only emerge as important and confronting when our need for love and interrelationship have been satisfied. So, basically, we can assume that the need for love and belonging supersede our drive for self-actualization and our motivation for achievement.
The Drive & Need for Self-Actualization is Inherent in Everyone
Self-actualization can be defined as a basic human need and motivation for the fulfillment of one’s talents and potential. Once a person realizes their talents, they are enticed by their natural spirit to be fulfilled through their capabilities to succeed in their achievements.
6 Characteristics That Define Self-Actualization–According To Maslow
1-Accepting & Realistic: A self-actualized individual fully accepts himself/herself and others as they are. They do not ordinarily feel inhibited and are consequently free to experience and explore their life without crippling guilt. They demonstrate this characteristic throughout their patterns of acceptance of others, no matter their individual background, culture, economic or social status.
Being realistic is a prominent quality of a self-actualization person, as well. They are able to see situations without fear allowing them to understand the unknown or exceptional through the lens of rational and logical view points.
2-Problem Solving: Self-actualized individuals are not problem-centered but are problem-focused for others. They are not consumed with themselves but rather interested in the common good of other people. They use their skills and tools in helping others to improve their lives and gain tremendous satisfaction for their own lives; however, this is not the main reason for them helping others. They do it because their characteristics motivate them to.
3-Spontaneous: Self-actualized people are prone to be open, unorthodox, and posses the quality of spontaneity. Although they respect social guidelines, they do not feel restricted and are not governed by them in their individual behavioral patterns nor in their thinking.
4-Autonomous & Solitude: Self-actualized individuals seem to be quite autonomous and not dependent on others. They are not concerned with what others may think of them nor are they influenced by other people’s concept of happiness and joy. Their realistic view permits them to live in the present and experience freely what life has to offer.
Self-actualized people honor their privacy and can be happy alone while valuing the company of others. In fact, spending time in solitude allows for self-evaluation and the development and furthering of their potential assets.
5-Grateful: Self-actualized people do not take life for granted. On the contrary, they are especially appreciative of everything. They remain in awe of and take exception to the ordinary and wonder of life’s beauty and experiences.
6-Peak Experiences: A “peak experience” is a feeling of unlimited opportunities available, the feeling of having more power but yet experiencing more vulnerability at the same time. It is a euphoric experience of wonder and being in awe, and the convincing results that something extraordinary has transpired by the transformation and strength that occurs in one’s life.
Is There Any Doubt?
After viewing and digesting the 6 characteristics of self-actualization, is there any doubt about what we should be striving for? True, no one in this world is perfect. However, wouldn’t it be nice to spend our life-long journey in pursuit of the character traits that would make us truly happy and accessible to those who may need our assistance, whoever they may be?
References
Baumeister, R., Leary, M. (1995). The Need To Belong: Desire for Interpersonal Attachments as a Fundamental Human Motivation.
Psychological Bulletin, 117, (3), p. 497-529. Retrieved from http://scholar.harvard.edu/marianabockarova/files/need_to_belong.pdf
Cherry, K. (2016). Characteristics of self-actualized People. Retrieved from https://www.verywell.com/what-are-peak-experiences-2795268
